The last few months have been some of the hardest I have had to deal with for almost 20 years. Those who know me well and to whom I have divulged my past to know what I am referring too (it will not be repeated here or ever on this blog for that matter). At the lowest point of my life I had the best sisters in the world! They stepped in gave me support and loved me no matter the situation I was in, physically and mentally. At that time, so long ago, I had to depend on myself to get through, now i have a pretty cool guy who helps me through.
We, the man and I, have been married 20 years as of May 6th. It seems unbelievable that this came from us
Our journey as a family has been one of much struggle over the last few months. From helping our girls work through the trials of boys, life, school and work to finding ways to keep our spirits full of positive thoughts. Having the constant pounding of negativity all around certainly makes life feel like a ocean of full waves. They, my girls, have had to deal with such a time that I wish they could have had it easier. I hope that their dad and I have been helpful in their path. I am glad my girls are smiling and having a good time in this photo. They are so wonderful and I hope they know how much I wish they did not have to be in this spot with us.
My boys are having a struggle as well. It is tough to be in the same house with sisters who need so much of our time, but their support has been so good for the girls. They are good boys, strong boys and great ones who have been trying so hard to be supportive and loving. It is hard for them as well to work around all that is going on. John is just recovering from a lengthy illness that has taken him down one or two notches. Jake is working making friends at yet another school where he has been transferred too. Lucky it was a school where he had some friends already.
As for me, I am trying to work on things. I have found in the last bit that my hubs and I have been working hard on staying strong. Staying on the same page and talking a lot. We have gone over and over in our minds what we could have/should have/would have done to make things easier or better. I am not sure we could have done anything different then what has already happened. We spend a lot of time by the river on Sunday afternoons to just let all the energy out and to be together. Makes for a fun time. I have some videos that were taken last sunday just have to get them loaded.
Now back to being married 20 years. It has been quite a ride. A journey that, 20 years ago, I thought i would never be able to take, had it not been for his belief in me. Our journey has not been one of ease by any means. Money has always been an issue, often we have gone without for our children. Often our children have gone without as well. We dont get vacations or trips for fun, like Disney or any theme park for that matter. We barely are able to get camping together (which I am not a fan of, but I go anyway). I wish I could give more but I, we, have found that they have just enough. Enough to fill their hearts with love, joy and happiness.
