Mallows, Temple, Work

Have you ever thought of the joy of Marshmallows? really think about it. You can toast them, take off the toasty part, eat it, then toast it again, eat it, toast it again, eat it...until its gone? I was thinking about this the other day with my friend. We had a discussion about the joy of food. Food is so delicious, sometimes...well most of the time. I have decided that I may want to work on a podcast. I have a friend at work who really is great. She is understanding, kind, open, loving, sincere basically awesome. I run across people like her about once every...never...or every once in a great while. It took us a while to find each other but we did and its great. We are working on our eating together and it really is making a difference. I have someone to be accountable too and its nice. We both have been working on watching what we are eating and talking to each other about food. We talk a lot about food the food we love, the stuff we want to eat, we cant (shouldnt) eat. But we found a way to not deprive ourselves. We started texting on the weekends and being a bit more accountable. Its funny cause we can say anything to the other and I know for me there is some peace in that. So you ask are we loosing weight? Yes slowly, ever so slowly and that is okay. When we have a crappy day and fall off the train we just get back on. Seems to be working out well for both of us.

On the flip side we are both pretty darn funny. We laugh at everything and find humor in just about all topics. Sometimes we sit in the lunch room and laugh through lunch. I am thinking the fun we have is contagious and others should hear it. We could invite friends on and have chats about life and times of people. I wish i were not so anxious about it. I need to do some more research before we start it and we have to find a time to do it. I will get to it, just have to get past the anxiety.

Brenda and i went to the General Womens Conference a week ago. My other 2 girls were working so I asked Brenda to go with me. She wasnt feeling that hot but i think she was hungry. I asked if i could take a photo of her belly, she always gets a bit anxious about it but i got permission to post it. I am in awe of the fact that she is going to be a mother. Maybe its the fact that I feel so young still and I still think she is my little girl. (although i am done raising girls, they are too much work and i am tired). Skyler seems very excited about it. I think for Brenda it is a bit surreal becoming a mother and dealing with all that entails. She is going to be fine though, she will be amazing. But i still have her as this little red head spunky girl who always wanted her hair in ponies and out of her face. She was always bossy and quite assertive about where and what she wanted to do. She was a huge help when she was a little girl. She is a wonderful young woman who is slowly showing motherly ways, I love her more now then the first time i saw her and they put her in my arms. 

I have a confession, I have not been to the temple probably since Brenda got married. Life gets in the way, not an excuse just is what it is. That is not a good thing by any means. One of Shanes Elders had the chance to go through the temple for the first time so I made it a priority to make sure i was there. It was nice to be there. Just looking at the flowers on the temple grounds is nice. The grounds of the temple not only here but around the world are so beautiful. I am always impressed with the workmanship that goes into taking care of the temple grounds. It makes me want to go in and stay for a while. The flowers made me want to be closer to the Lord, to try to understand His will for me and our family. I really went in with some thoughts in my mind on specific things. I have been missing my mum quite a bit lately and really longed to feel her presence. I also have had my grandchild on my mind. I wanted some peace in my soul about this little one coming. 

Sitting in a room where there is quite, soft lighting, soft words really opens your heart to hear the Spirit of God. For some reason that night the seat i was in was comfortable but not too comfortable, the temperature was just right, behind me there was an empty seat, next to me was a sweet lady who was ever so valiantly trying to stay awake and off to my right was my husband. The scene was just right for me to be open. No thoughts of my 10 hour work day were streaming through my head, i was hungry but not too bad, i concentrated on the words and the artistry of the room i was in. If you have never had the chance to go through a Mormon temple take the time to take a walk through if you ever are close to an open house. The craftsmanship is stunning. I get the joy of seeing it up close and personal whenever i want. Its such a calming peaceful place. No one speaks above a whisper, there are no cell phones going off, in fact there are no cell phones to be seen any where. People look you in the eye to talk to you, the workers there have a kindness in their eyes that makes the world melt away and you are the only person in the world they are talking too. It is a place where complete peace can be found in the chaos. Stillness is there, comfort and peaceful stillness.

As i was saying i have been missing my mum, i got to feel the peacefulness of my mum. To know she watches over me. I found answers to the things which were bothering me, both joyful answers and some not so joyful answers. Overall it was a fabulous evening. I wish i could say more about what i felt, saw, and experienced but alas it was a bit too private for me to tell. Needless to say when you think you are on the wrong track, you really are not. Trusting in yourself is important.

I have an new work schedule I now work 4 10 hour days. I started last week, it has been a bit tiring for me but i really like it. I feel like I can get in there and get things accomplished. 10 hour days are nice for me. I get home about 6ish which is good for the kids. They asked me to take this shift and have fridays off so i can spend some time with them. Summer will be more fun i think and i can have long weekends to help Brenda when the baby comes. Skyler will be in school and working so I am hoping to be more help. I found that i am getting more responsibilities at work and more projects sometimes a bit more then i can handle but i somehow make it work and get the work done. I like the challenge as my brain doesnt stop if i dont give it direction. 

One more topic for you, i have had some issues with my health lately. Nothing to be too alarmed about but they are there. I have some medications i have been on for a while and it would seem they need to be adjusted. The adjustments are throwing things out of wack, which is annoying. But at the same time, it is needed. Blood pressure is important to be steady not too high, yet not too low. Unfortunately since i have had the boys it has been sky high, now over the last 3 months its receded and gone low much too low so that medication has to be adjusted. I have also found my thyroid and sugar levels in my body are not cooperating with my brain or some crazy thing and there are some preemptive steps being taken to remedy those issues. Worry not people, my sweet work friend is on my side and in my face and we are working on the diet part of life which seems to be really working with the medication changes. Those medications may not be needed by the end of summer hopefully. I am working on making me better. My doctor is fantastic and wonderful. She keeps tabs on me to really take care. 

So there is the blah update, wishing i had marshmallows to eat, but smelling Jakes brownies in the oven will do. Life is going well so far...until next time