I have sufficient for my needs

I have been thinking a lot about this particular saying. I have sufficient for my needs. Probably because I WANT more things but i dont really need anything more.
List of things I want (but do not need):

1. new car
2. super big fluffy pillows and about 9 million (okay not really) of them
3. a job that pays 3 times what I make now
4. about 12 more pairs of shoes (which may or may not include new stylish boots)
5. a new wardrobe (all new dress slacks, shirts and skirts)
6. new phone (which may or may not be most awesome)
7. new wonderful amazing bathroom

Well you get what i mean, i could make a list a mile long. So I was contemplating this list of things which contemplation may or  may not have included one or all of these things, then i realized none of this is really necessary. Sure all of it would be nice, but in reality the list of things i have that are sufficient:

1. A car that runs and starts every day
2. 2 pillows and one for my knees (cause my hips are not my friend after 5 children)
3. a new job that has given me a bit of raise (that covers the cost of insurance for my family)
4. 3 new pair of shoes that cost me less than $50 (purchased with a gift card my hubby got from work)
5. Shopping spree at Goodwill that cost me less than $20 and got me a pair of trousers, 2 shirts and a tank top (that is sparkly and lovely-all in my new size)
6. my phone works amazing and really doesnt need to be replaced
7. One bathroom that still works, just fine.

There is more i can put on here but why complain. This year is starting out as a wonderful fantastic year. Shane and I visited the temple to just talk for a while and spend time, the Meridian Temple is quite beautiful. I had not been in side to see any of the rooms. Being in one particular room there is a beautiful mural of the scenery of Idaho. I spent a lot of time staring at the walls. Looking at the talent of the artist. I am constantly amazed at the talent that surrounds me. I am so not talented like that. I see the talents of those around me and i wish often for just a smidgen of that. I wonder what my talents are....i will keep wondering for a while till i figure it out. 

See these hats, this is that talent of my sons. We found a lot of yarn in the house hiding. We forgot there were looms in the house, so we set the boys to work on hats. We have found that over the Christmas holiday we need to keep the kids active. We gathered the looms and the boys sat around and watched movies and made hats. All different sizes and colors....of course the best one was on our sweet boy Axel

So then we ended up with a bunch of hats, what to do, what to do....The boys first wanted to give them to the local women's shelter, then John said what if we give them to the pediatric wing at the hospital so the kids there can have some fun hats. So I sent an email to Saint Alphonsus and got an answer back, the Director of Development a woman named Robin Navert said the hospital would be happy to have them. The boys and I made an appointment and off we went. St Alphonsus is not too far from us and is a relatively new hospital. It was fun to see the boys be interviewed, sort of, by here. She took some photos and asked some questions. It was a nice time. They are great boys. All their doing really. Funny how having sufficient for your needs can create a giving attitude in the home. 

I had been having quite the struggle with my job. It had become stressful and quite bothersome. I often felt like i couldnt achieve what i wanted. So i was feeling down. I came home to a dinner prepared, with candles lit. It was a lovely night. This was the night i came home to beautiful christmas lights up in my house as well. 

Again, sufficient for my needs. I was beginning to question constantly, WHY, WHY, WHY....you know the old mantra of why me, constantly in my head. Then i come home to the beauty of my own home, our own kitchen, my family coming together to think of me. There was food, so it was for them as well, but they were excited to do this for me. I love the Christmas lights, it makes the ambiance of the house just a bit softer. Sometimes when Axel is here i turn on the lights and we play and hang out. Looks sort of like this:

Dont mind the laundry in the background or the dirty house...but seriously SUFFICIENT for my needs. Shane found a bunch of toys at a yard sale and brought them home for Axel....it was so fun to watch him play.

This will not be the first nor the last time i say this boy Axel Hugh Rigby, saved my marriage. The beginning of our lives as grandparents started rough, but having this sweet one come from the arms of my mother and brother directly to our family brought a bit of peace. The more he grows the better and better our lives become because of him. Shane and I were at a yard sale and saw some old Tonka trucks, the metal ones. We immediately bought them, cause every boy should have Tonka trucks. We took them to his parents and they were so grateful. My joy was full, that these broken up Tonka trucks made them happy. 

Seeing Shane with Axel makes my heart sing every time. The photos are fuzzy, because Grandpappy was making Axel laugh. Shane does a lot of the play with Axel he did with our kids, maybe a bit gentler (as he is older and is a gentle giant now) For some reason grabbing a beard is a fun thing, Grandpappy loves it no matter how many times Axel grabs him. 

Shane is very talented. Shane and the boys started buying and selling things, as a way to earn some extra money for our family. In his looking he found this awesome couch. It is basically brand new, the family was moving to Hawaii, we bought it from them for less than a quarter of what they wanted. I love this couch, had been in their home for less than 4 months. It is absolutely amazing. For what we paid its worth every single penny and more than that. I have to say i have more than enough. Working hard at becoming more.

So sufficient for my needs, a rose from my love. He is my joy. There are so many words that I could use to tell you about my love for him. Yet i shall remain silent. My life is sufficient, my world is sufficient. I am beginning to understand the importance of "I have sufficient for my needs". 

It is hard to believe these kids have grown are now filling my life with so much joy. Shane and I say we now have a success rate of 3 out of 5...Brenda, Makayla and Laura are all on their way to greatness. They all love the gospel, Laura is prepping for her mission (still in the plans but we have a year), Makayla is going to school and working. She is also working in church with all the ladies to help them be united under the banner of Relief Society. Brenda is an amazing mother and creative. She has grown so much, her choice to have Axel and not go to school may sound stupid to the world, but Skyler is an amazing man, they pray together, talk together, they conference with each other....they work it out. I am so proud of them for all they work out together. As a husband and a wife, we stand back, let them work it through...and find joy in their growing family. John and Jake have some time left with us, but we have time with them every night to read scriptures and they question everything. Its a joy to have all of them....it is sufficient....i am whole and happy in my heart.