Friends, Johns Birthday, Mothers ring

I was sitting I church thinking about a time when we first moved to Idaho. There was a man in our ward who’s profession was a tailor. He made the most beautiful clothing. One day he asked Shane and I if he could come to our house. Of course we said yes. This man is gregarious and open and so very kind. He brought over his shoe shining kit and shined all of our Sunday shoes. Often I think of that gesture of humble kindness show to our struggling family in an somewhat affluent ward. We were certainly out of place as we had just moved from the back woods of Maine to the city of Boise. Oddly enough I cannot remember his name but I can see his smile in my mind.

This makes me think of all of the kindnesses done for our family over the years. I am overwhelmed by the pure love of Christ shown to us. This week has been a difficult one at work. Which them makes it difficult at home as I was very tired. I have a wonderful friend who checks on me and often I will send a message to her just complaining. She always responds with the flat out truth. She told me it sucks but you are going to make it through. Yesterday she brought me a rose bush and planted it in one of my planter pots. She also brought a bowl of fresh raspberries.  I was not home as Shane and I had another appointment with some good friends who we have dinner with once a month. This dinner was very needed and it was wonderful to have the outlet of good friends. These great friends sent us home with delicious cake. (Which my boys scarfed). On the way home my girls Brenda and Makayla said hey let’s go out for ice cream date. So Dairy Queen had a visit from us. I ponder on how I am watched over...even when I am down and out. There are always people to pick us up.

Laura had been working hard on her mission. The times with the companion she had have been a bit difficult. She was learning to be kind and understanding. These are things she has learned from her family but it is a whole different issue when you are placed with another woman you do not know. I know she has worked very hard to overcome herself and serve the Lord the best she can. She has had much success with finding people and working them towards baptism. However there has been much disappointment also. The biggest disappointment I think for her was coming home early. I stopped blogging and doing anything with Facebook. I also limited the information I have been putting on Instagram. I wanted Laura to figure out her issues and find strength in herself before I said anything. She came home early, not our deal, its hers. A friend put on Instagram the other day about kids doing hard things. This friend said the hard things make them better people. Stronger and more able to care for themselves instead of hanging on to your parents. Lauras decisions are her own and I am not going to comment on what any of the issues were. I will not lie it was terribly difficult for me to wrap my head around, I cried a lot...maybe had a few times when i wailed and screamed and cried (I may have woken up children during my wailing). There has been such good guidance from some of our leaders. I think Shane and I have learned a new form of compassion and understanding. However as parents we have to let our adult children do what they need to do for their own lives.

On to more wonderful things. Or some other things...photos are coming:

Makayla picked me up from work one day, we went shopping for crap and talked about everything. Makayla is at a turning point in her life, school, full time job...where to go next what to do. She is making such great choices though. She is the most tender loving girl. I worry that someone will take advantage of her...i keep telling her to pay attention to her internal feelings and follow the promptings of the Spirit. She has so much coming up in her life but she is strong and smart and very capable of anything she wants to do.

I love having good friends. My sweet friend Cindy went with me to see the Piano Guys. The concert was okay, i was a bit disappointed in the showmanship of it but i am used to Foo Fighters. Cindy and I had a great time talking and working through the issues that are facing us. At the time it was just after Laura had come home and I was still working through all of my feelings. She has been patient and kind and given good advice. I love this woman more than she knows. What a strength and support you can get from those around you when you ask. 

This year my boy John turned 17...can you believe that 17. I was so afraid for this boy for so many years however he is growing up (tall almost as tall as his dad) and strong (just as strong as his dad really)  He wanted meatballs and spaghetti for his birthday. Really big meatballs is what he wanted...so I accommodated. 

For the past few years I have wanted a mothers ring. Shane is really good at surprising me. I am not a big fan of surprises but he likes them. I have a lot of words but none I can write. It has been a hard 24 years in this marriage. Many many ups and downs, more down than ups....also being very poor, money wise. Over the past 6 months there has been a slow pick up of financial security. Because of my job at Simplot we were able to pay down all of our debt (of which we did not have much) which just leaves our house. We have a goal to pay off our house in the next 4-5 years. It will be tight but worth it in the end. So one day this ring and flowers appeared at my work. The poor man at the front desk saw me cry, he was super sweet about it. All the ladies asked me to keep the flowers at work for a few days. So I did, they were lovely. My ring had to be sized but now its on my hand all the time. I love it. Sometimes the little things become big things and life is a nice place to be. 

I have not been that great at doing this blog lately. So much has been going on and a lot of it was things that were tough and I had to process. Often its best for me to just think on it and pray about it and find some peace in myself before sending it to the world. A couple of quotes came to me during this time.

So i am working on being a good friend, sister, mother, wife....

So if you ever need anyone, i am here to chat...to help you work through your issues. I am not that great at it but i commiserate well....Someday the things i go through will help someone else.