Struggles, Accidents, Support

Life is full of ups and downs. This week as been totally down, hoping for the upswing. One of our children has been struggling for a while and its a private situation that we are not discussing outside of our family. I love all of my children with all that I am, this week has proven that to me. I have often compartmentalized my time and this week has been difficult doing that. My kids are funny, crazy, kind, compassionate and slightly insane. I love having them around.

One of our children has been struggling for a while with some issues which affect progress. This child has had such support this week from siblings. This child is working on issues that have affected life in many ways. We as parents have been there as much as we can and know how. Sometimes outside help is needed. Dont be afraid to get that outside help, even if that child says they are ok, probe until you find out if they are. The siblings have rallied around the one to bring joy, happiness, strength, love to one another. It is an amaizng thing to see. I cannot tell you how proud I am of the humans they are becoming. They are compassionate, kind, understanding..everything i wish i was at their perspective ages. They have rallied around each other for more than one reason.

On Jan 18th Makayla and John were doing errands and turning into a parking lot. They were rear ended by a car that was hit by a Peterbilt semi hauling a piece of equipment. The semi was going 45 miles per hour and didn't break in time. Makayla called her dad and got out of the car and took photos. John got out to walk around. The police officer said my kids are the first kids she has ever met who were calm and collected and told her what happened then gave her the photos she took. I got the call at work and headed to St Al's to meet the children at the ER. When I arrived Brenda, Laura and Jake were there to meet me. The nurse who was over the children came out to see me and stated that she had never seen such calm collected children. Brenda and Laura went into be with Makayla and Jake and I went into John. When i got there he cried a bit, but mostly because he was relieved to see me. He told me he was fine and that he loved me and wanted Makayla to be ok. Laura said when Makayla saw her Makayla was relieved.

I took the kids home and on the way home Makayla said her head hurt. We immediately called Michael to get her into see him. Darla, Michael's wife, told us to come by later. We did, he took 2 hours with the kids working on them to help them.

Michael and Darla Plyer have been a blessing in our life. They have become another set of parents to our children. Darla was so kind to have us over and while Michael was taking care of the kids she was taking care of me. She knew i was emotional, tired and probably a bit broken that night. She took the time to walk me through what i needed to start to be healed. I am so grateful to have her as a mother/friend. I can say anything to her and she takes the time to respond and give me good straight forward advice. Our love for them grows by the day.

I am so grateful to have others in my life who take care of me when i need it. I have found another good friend who has taken the time to actually get to know me. I am not very good at letting people in. I do not have many people in my life that really know my struggles and frustrations. I have tried really hard with Mormon people and its tough, there are maybe 2 or 3 that i have connected with in my life. One lives close by me and i am so grateful for her. I will talk about her another time. Right now I want to talk about a friend who works close to me. Somehow she takes me as i am, she sees me through the tough trials when i cannot take one more step. She was the one who I cried on last week when i thought my children were damaged beyond repair, or was going to loose one. Her support has been...something I cannot describe. She has not allowed me to wallow, to feel pity, to sink into the arms of depression. She has validated how i feel and encouraged me to be more than i am. I am forever grateful to her for her support. She will never know how much she means to me.

This week has been a bit calmer and I am tired. I think catch up from last week is getting to me. The emotional struggle over the last week could have put me in a bad spot but it didnt. I am doing ok. My children are recovering, getting stronger. I can hug them and show them how much i love them, whereas a week ago i couldnt touch them. I can work and know that all is well in our home. The support of siblings is an amazing thing. My siblings support me the same way i watch my kids. I am so very grateful to have all of my siblings in my life. Of the struggles i have been in they have supported me in so many ways. I am glad to be where i am....