Today was a terrible horrible day. I am not sure this job is going to work out as well as i had originally planned but eh for now it will work. Getting yelled at for something I didnt do or have anything to do with is quite annoying. Listen folks, if you have a variable rate on anything look it over and call the company to get your rate changed. Dont yell at the customer service person on the other end. They can only do so much to help you. Its not their fault you are an idiot and cant watch your bills. Done with that rant...
As I got home I didnt want to go work out or do anything for that matter, but my hubs encouraged us to go for a walk. We piled the kids in the van and went down to a park close by to go for a walk. The day is glorious and lovely and it was a wonderful way to talk to him without any other noise. The kids took off with the dog and teased each other while the dog followed. It was so nice to have some time walking and talking out our family issues. It made me feel closer to him. Made me have a better connection with him. I think we have made a better connection over the last few months. It has been hard, both of us have struggled in our own ways and in the end have found a peace with each other that wasnt there before. Does this come with marriage? Does it come with the trials of life? Does it happen because we realize that we are in this for the haul, forEVER, together??? I am not sure but a certain peace has arrived and I am pretty happy to have it for right now.
Another thing I have done today is I actually created a workout program! I didnt think I could do it. I did though and it was awesome. Today we (my girlfriend, I have to think up a new word besides girlfriend sounds so stupid....i will work on that...and I) worked out hard and got some real work done on our bi/tri and shoulders. I am sure we will feel it tomorrow. I have to say that I had an AWESOME teacher who is one of the most amazing people I have ever met. I have decided that I want to be strong, like her. I want to be assertive (or more so) like her. I want to challenge myself like her. (Ok maybe not as challenging). I have to keep thinking of ways to become stronger and assertive like her. I want to find it in me to keep driving myself to loose the weight I want and be healthy, strong, and wear a smaller size. I want to get to a 14/16 and buy cute clothes. (a smaller bra wouldnt hurt either, along with a nice tummy tuck!) I want to be off medication. Strong enough to take my hubs down and to enjoy the rest of my life.
Oh these are lofty goals, of which, I have never made any in my life. Can I keep the goals that is the question. I am not sure. How do you keep goals, how do you find ways to motivate yourself to do better? Sure I am on a high now but how do I keep this? I am not sure. Somehow I have to find a way to channel that whatever it is and make it work.
I am glad I have found some sort of peace and some sort of strength in working out. I am even more glad for those who support me. I am so grateful to have someone to go with me and is willing to do what I ask her to do, its a challenge for me to be there for her and support her. I want to serve her the way I was served by someone (amazing) so we both can become strong. Strong in body and spirit.
I am certainly really lazy, ok laid back....so we shall see where this goes. For now my body feels good...but its going to get better.
2 comments:
Both of you are amazing and this will be awesome. I'm excited to see results. Glad you and Shane are doing well. Great news.
So glad the day ended awesome. Good luck with your goals. You can do it for sure.
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